Have you ever had a decision to make and had it consume your thoughts so much that it completely drains you? That’s me right now.

Even as I type this, I have no idea what I’m going to say, because… my. brain. is. done. I’m tired. I’m overthinking everything. I don’t have peace about any path in front of me. I have no energy. All I really want to do is get in my car, drive to a lake with a mountain view, make a cup of coffee, sit, sip, and stare. At nothing. Think about nothing.

Seriously.

This is why I didn’t have anything to post yesterday. I’m actually having to force myself to do this this week. I considered skipping, because it’s my blog so I can do whatever I want with it, right?

Wrong.

This blog is God’s. I never wanted it. I merely took the necessary steps to make it happen out of obedience. For some reason, this is where God has me, so I’m going to do my best to put 100% into it.

Here’s my problem… I have to move. And those of you that have known me for more than 5 years just went, “Again?!” Ha ha! Yep! Again. And those of you that haven’t known me that long are now wondering how many times I’ve moved. Well, the answer is A LOT! This move will make number 15 just since I’ve lived in Lafayette, and the amount of time I’ve lived here is getting very close to being half of my life.

So, you can about imagine how tired I am of moving. In fact, I’m so fed up with moving that the thought of it makes me want to cry. It’s because of this that I’ve been considering buying a home that would be feasible for me to maintain. But, due to some poor choices I’ve made in the past, I’ve got some debt that is keeping me from wanting to go in that direction right now. I just don’t think it’s wise to bury myself in more debt right now. This means that I’ll be renting until I can pay that debt down.

Now, I have been searching and seen so many different options, but never in my life have I seen so many places that depress me. Not necessarily because of where they are or how they look, but because of how expensive it is to simply live as a single person. It can be so discouraging. Especially since I’m not just looking for something within my budget, but I’m looking for something within budget that will also allow me enough wiggle room to pay my debt down as quickly as possible.

So I’m trying to ask myself what God is trying to teach or show me right now, because there’s a reason for everything, right? I think that might be the hardest part of this. Trying to see how God is moving instead of seeing all of the ways I’d like Him to move. And I see Him moving, I really do. But I see Him moving in areas that have nothing to do with my moving. Yet, I think seeing where He is working is giving me what I need to keep going.

Because I know that God is moving in the area that is more important. I know that He is working on answering prayers that I’ve been praying for much longer than a few months. I know that He is showing me how faithful He is through all of this. And I know that He isn’t going to leave me hanging with this move, either.

He loves me too much to do that. Knowing that truth is what makes breathing easier in this season. Which is what this is… a season. I’m blessed that this is just a season. And I’m thankful to be able to recognize that, because it helps to keep hope alive in me and to keep things in perspective.

Ok, I’m done complaining.

If you’ve been praying for me, thank you! I can feel your prayers. But now, I’d like to hear from you… How can I pray for you?